He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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