Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
