Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
