Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
How's work?
Spinning.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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