Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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