I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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