Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
