just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
