why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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