If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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