im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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