I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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