Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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