Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
