How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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