My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize