Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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