I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
