just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
