I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Randomize
