Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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