Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
