He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
