We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
she peed on how many people?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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