It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Randomize
