That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
