I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
