i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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