i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
