dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
