Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
