I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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