good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
