Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
