i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
