I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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