Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
