Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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