i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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