You don't have asthma, your pregnant
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
