I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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