I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
