Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
