During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
My vagina is very pro this idea
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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