think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize