What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
we're making bets on your personal life
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
