I wish I could punch you in the face.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
