Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
