At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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