its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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